


Anything

by Tenmei



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: ALSO!!! healing hanzo!! he is trying his best !!!!!, Fluff, M/M, but jesse being too afraid to get close to anyone ? YUMMY, i love my happy go lucky cowboy just as much as the next guy, not enough fics that focus on the fact jesse has gone through some hard shit too
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-11
Updated: 2017-05-11
Packaged: 2018-10-30 19:25:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,080
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10883367
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tenmei/pseuds/Tenmei
Summary: To this day, no one knows what McCree went through after he left Gabriel-- left Blackwatch. No one knows how he lost his arm. Only Gabe knows what he did when he was apart of Deadlock, and he was dead. McCree didn't completely trust anyone-- whether it be because he was afraid of caring too much only to lose them, or if it's because he grew up in such a fucked up situation it was hard for him to connect to others.





	Anything

**Author's Note:**

> i love them and also there's been so many bad fics in this tag lately (like racism noncon cheating etc) so im here to provide some fluffy
> 
> also will probably do pwp later ???

Everyone knew McCree had problems. 

He was a bright man. Boisterous, loud, family-oriented-- but he held people at arm's length. He kept up a happy facade, but he never disclosed personal information to anyone. He was all small talk-- even to his old best friends. Genji and Lena included.

To this day, no one knows what McCree went through after he left Gabriel-- left Blackwatch. No one knows how he lost his arm. Only Gabe knows what he did when he was apart of Deadlock, and he was dead. McCree didn't completely trust anyone-- whether it be because he was afraid of caring too much only to lose them, or if it's because he grew up in such a fucked up situation it was hard for him to connect to others.

Hanzo was warned of all this when he first confessed he felt something for McCree to Genji. He had't really meant to feel anything-- but it was inevitable due to how well they worked together. They were almost glued at the hip; they did everything together, from eating in the early morning to late night training sessions in the practice range.

He hadn't even known what he felt was love until McCree was injured in battle, and the utter panic Hanzo felt (that he generally did not feel when other members were hurt) confused him until he spoke to Genji about it. Who basically told him he had a crush. 

It had been a long time since Hanzo allowed himself to want something, but he was working on it. Working on /himself/. So, for the first time in a long time, he allowed himself to want something.

He wanted McCree to open up to him.

He didn't particularly care if McCree felt the same way-- it would be a bonus, no doubt-- but he wanted McCree to trust Hanzo. He wanted McCree to be able to tell Hanzo things, without worrying about the consequences or the like.

And with that, he was determined.

\--

"Would you like to join me for some tea?" Hanzo asks, tilting his head toward the cafeteria. They had just finished a small sparring match, and cooled down with a shower afterward.

"Don't drink tea, sug," he smiles almost apologetically. Hanzo shakes his head before McCree can turn away.

"I am saying it mostly in a figure of speech. I would like to spend more time with you outside of this," he gestures toward the practice range. McCree's eyebrows shoot high up on his forehead, and for good reason-- Hanzo does not confront people like this. He does /not/ ask to spend time with them. It's usually Genji begging Hanzo to stay a little while after dinner (usually when they come home from successful missions) to have a celebratory dessert. 

"Uh, alright. Don't see why not." He shrugs, and Hanzo preens a little bit, to himself. He turns on his heel to walk out, keeping an eye on McCree using his peripheral vision to make sure he was following.

They sit together at a smaller table, toward the corner of the cafeteria. No one was in there anyway, but they tucked themselves into a private area just in case. Hanzo had a cup of tea in hand and McCree held a glass of water.

There was a long silence as they drank, and Hanzo cleared his throat. McCree looked over at him, eyebrows arched, and it made heat rise up on the back of Hanzo's neck. "I just wanted to thank you," he forces out, hands clenched tightly around his cup.

"For what?" McCree asks, clearly beyond confused.

"You have helped me more than you know." At this, the cowboy's facial expression softens, and he nods at him.

"Does a man good to have someone to talk to. I know Genji got Zenyatta to talk to you a bit, or somethin'."

Hanzo nods along with McCree's words, before clearing his throat again. "It is why... I would like to offer you the same services."

"'Scuse me?" The bigger asks, and Hanzo has to look up to make sure he was just confused, not offended.

"I meant... I want to be there for you to talk to, as well." His chest and stomach tighten as he says this-- but he forces it out anyway. Genji's words echo in his mind.

/This could be a healing process for you both./

"I've been talkin' to you since day one, sweetheart," he jokes lightly, but his voice is tight and his smile doesn't reach his eyes.

"You know what I mean, Jesse," he says, and revels in the intake of air McCree has to take at Hanzo using his first name. He looks down at his rapidly cooling cup of tea as he speaks. He would rather say this and not be strong enough to look McCree in the eye, rather than look him in the eye and be too scared to say it at all. "You do not open up to anyone. I am not saying you are obligated to-- but it is as you said; it ''does a man some good to have someone to talk to'. "

McCree whistled low and ran a hand through his hair, a habit of which Hanzo knows is due to stress, or nerves. "And if I said I don't want to talk to ya?"

"Then I just want you to know that I will be here, in case you do-- someday."

McCree nods sharply, stands up, and walks out of the cafeteria. He didn't look mad at Hanzo, but maybe mad at himself. 

It takes all of Hanzo's willpower not to violently hate himself over it. 

\--

Things go back to normal between the two of them, but sometimes McCree doesn't show up to their scheduled practice range competitions and sometimes he looks like he wants to say something in the silence of getting their things from the lockers. He never does, though, and Hanzo is willing to wait as long as it takes for McCree to open up.

He can only thing about the patience Genji and Zenyatta had toward his own recovery.

\--

What triggers it is Ana's return.

She walks into the crowded cafeteria with her chin held high, Fareeha following close behind her.

"Ana?" McCree asks quietly, and it sounds so sad and weak Hanzo physically winces at it.

"I went into hiding to protect you. Both of you." She nods towards him and Fareeha.

McCree blinks over at the young woman. He was ashen and near shaking. "Did you know about this?"

At Fareeha's guilty look and nod, he silently pushed past the two of them and left. He didn't answer to anyone calling after him-- and Hanzo took to walking after him, instead.

Unsurprisingly, they end up at McCree's dorm. The door is closed before Hanzo can get to it, and he's forced to knock.

"Jesse," he calls, and waits. Knocks again.

McCree yanks open the door, eyes already red rimmed, color returned to his cheeks full force in different shades of red. "You need to get out of here," he warns, voice threatening between the breaks and creaks of it.

"No," Hanzo says firmly. He puts his foot in front of the door in case McCree decides to close it. "I am here for you."

"I don't care about you or your stupid therapy shit," he snaps, and it would be more hurtful if Hanzo didn't know he was just saying it because of his emotions-- because of what just happened. He did the same thing, when he first joined Overwatch. He had gotten in constant fights with Genji and Zenyatta over everything and anything.

"I care about /you/. I am here for you." He is unrelenting, and McCree's body slumps like he was a puppet and his strings had been cut. He starts sobbing loudly, and Hanzo gently pushes him into his room so he could slip inside as well. He closes the door behind him.

"I'm sorry," Jesse's voice warbles, and Hanzo shushes him, leading Jesse to rest his head on his shoulder. "I care about you."

It makes Hanzo's heart speed up, but he knows this isn't the time. He hums and rests his cheek against McCree's head, ignoring the wetness of tears and snot he's getting on his shoulder.

There's some more silence between the hiccups and sniffling before Jesse speaks up. "She's.... She was like my mom," he finally says, voice growing tighter toward the end of the sentence like he was about to cry again. "She /was/ my mom. Took care of me. Raised me with Fareeha." His grip on Hanzo's clothing is tight, and Hanzo just pets a hand down Jesse's back repeatedly. "Hurts," he says, once, before crying again, silently this time. Hanzo wraps his arms around as much of Jesse's large body as he could, in a hug.

They were getting somewhere.

\--

Jesse shook his head as he watched Ana snipe Fareeha with biotic bullets during a training session. "I still can't believe she's back."

Hanzo hums, standing next to him. They were both waiting their turn for the range, leaning against a wall and watching the mother and daughter practice together.

"I do not know of her story-- just that she was a famous sniper, and she had died."

"She was apparently sniped by WidowMaker, back when Talon first recruited her." Jesse scoffed. "This was a little bit after I had left Blackwatch, so I didn't find out until she stopped replying to my letters. Had to get a hold of a working TV. Hard to find that kinda stuff when you're constantly traveling."

Hanzo nodded, understanding. "Why did you leave Blackwatch?" He ventured gently, trying to get Jesse to open up more. 

"Er-- well." Jesse swallowed hard. "Jack had became Strike Commander, over Gabriel, my commander. It tore Reyes to bits. Loved that man like my own father," he says, and Hanzo sees his hands clench tightly, to hide the pain. "But he was tearing himself apart. Couldn't watch that anymore. Didn't want to see someone I saw as my hero turn into the villain. So I left."

"You saw him as a hero?" Hanzo whispers.

"Before Blackwatch, I was apart of Deadlock. He scooped me up from there-- gave me a job with Blackwatch. Save my damn life."

Hanzo nodded, and brushed his hand against Jesse's gently in a 'thank you'. He wouldn't thank him out loud-- Jesse is a prideful man, and he was worried he would embarrass him if he thanked him.

"All yours, boys!" Fareeha called, waving as she landed, putting a hand on her mother's back as they made their way to the locker room.

Jesse tipped his hat at her, and they made their way onto the range.

\--

Hanzo cornered him after breakfast one day, dragging him outside to feel the cool morning air against their cheeks and the warm, awakening sun on their scalps. He cleared his throat gently, looking down at his feet. He could allow himself this indulgence-- but that didn't mean he had to be brave and keep eye contact while he was doing it.

He and Jesse had made great progress-- they were closer than ever, and sometimes he even came with Hanzo to Zenyatta's meditation sessions. He couldn't stay as long as Genji or Hanzo did-- talking about 'not patient enough to sit that long', but Hanzo also knew it was because he had a hard time talking about his past-- trusting people with the knowledge of what happened to him. He understood, probably more than Jesse knew.

"I just wanted to tell you, that I," he clears his throat again. Scuffs his prosthetic foot against the ground-- unable to feel the dewy grass in the way those without prosthetic do, but still enjoying the texture. Finding comfort in it. "I wanted to tell you I harbor feelings for you-- romantic feelings. And I have for quite a while." He runs the palm of his hand up his arm, keeping his eyes downcast as he felt his stomach rise to his throat. "I'm sorry if that is discomforting--"

"Now, against popular belief, I ain't the biggest fan of jokes." Hanzo whips his head up, and sees McCree's jaw set, eyes dark like flint. He isn't wearing any of his battlefield armor, or his serape, but his steadily growing bad mood makes him look bigger than ever. "I expected better than this from you, partner."

Hanzo's jaw dropped. "That is not what I-- Jesse McCree, when have you ever taken me for a man who would play with someone's feelings as if they were some kind of joke?" His stomach is no longer in his throat due to the confrontation of his feelings, and his cheeks are now rapidly heating up under McCree's misunderstanding and anger. "If you do not feel the same, then tell me. Do /not/ accuse me of something so insensitive, not after I had worked so hard--"  
McCree suddenly looks very confused and panicked, waving his hands desperately in front of his face. "N-naw, naw, I'm sorry, Hanzo, mighty sorry. I didn't think-- I don't--" He runs his hand through his hair roughly, sighing through his nose. "I can't understand why you'd like me, ya know? After all you've been through."

"...What do you mean?" Hanzo asks, voice losing it's edge, now just soft curiosity.

"Like, you worked so hard with Zen and Genji to get better 'n all, 'n I figure after all those times you've saw me... Uh... Have breakdowns or whatever, you'd want someone that isn't... That doesn't... Remind you? Of how you were? Or somethin'." He gave a tight lipped smile that Hanzo didn't return.

"Jesse..." He reached out to gently grab McCree's hand. "It's because I went through what I did that I understand you. I know it's hard to talk about your feelings after so long of not being able to." He's staring at their connected hands, now, unable to look at Jesse once more. "Most days are hard for me too." And neither of them would expect Hanzo to be the more understanding one, but when he has Genji and Zenyatta to help him through his rough patches, and Jesse has no one, he can't stand back and watch this man he likes so much to rip himself up, and not see how wonderful he truly is.

Jesse's hand gently tilted Hanzo's head up, and the smaller blinked up at him.

"I'm sorry. I like ya too, cupcake. I just didn't know I was allowed to." Hanzo squeezes Jesse's hand, firm and comforting.

\--

They fell into bed together, a few nights later. Jesse was a bit desperate, and while Hanzo didn't mind going rough, he also wanted to enjoy this. Wanted /Jesse/ to enjoy this. He gripped Jesse's wrists, when his hands happened to be gripping his chest in almost reverence.

"We do not have to go fast," Hanzo murmurs hotly against Jesse's lips when he makes a questioning noise. "We have all night, all tomorrow, and every day there after that you will have me."

Jesse made almost a pained noise, thumbs flicking up and over Hanzo's nipples-- pulling a gasp from Hanzo's lips.

"I wanna have you as long as you'll have /me/, Han," he says, lips moving from the smaller's to his neck instead. "You're some kinda angel, I swear."

Hanzo pulled his hands away from the cowboy's wrists to instead wrap around his shoulders, one hand threading through his unruly hair. "If I am an angel, then you are a god," he whispers softly. "You are a much better man than I, Jesse McCree--"

The taller growled, hands moving quickly to Hanzo's hips and pulling them flush together. "Now don't you start."

"I didn't, you did," Hanzo pointed out, smug, and Jesse only bit the crook of Hanzo's neck in reply.

Needless to say, it went slowly from there on out.

\--

The next morning was more refreshing than any one Hanzo had felt beforehand, and he's sure it's due to the large, warm body pressed against his back, hand threaded with his own.

He knows Jesse is awake, but he doesn't want to break the silence just yet. He allows Jesse to snuffle at his neck and nose at the back of his ear before he speaks up. "Thank you." His voice is hoarse, and he rubs his thumb gently across Jesse's knuckles.

Jesse kisses the spot he was just nosing at. "Nothin' to thank me for, honey," he croons, and his legs move as though he was going to tangle them with Hanzo's-- before realizing he had no legs to tangle with.

"I lost them before I... Attacked Genji," Hanzo murmurs in answer to the unasked question. "It gave me an advantage-- a bit of unfair one, I might add-- when it came to the actual deed itself. I don't remember how I lost them-- the doctor mentioned something along the lines of memory loss due to trauma."

Jesse's hand lets go of Hanzo's to rub up his arm, goosebumps rising in its wake.

"Lost my arm during a Blackwatch mission," he says, voice even deeper in the morning, and Hanzo could barely repress the shudder in reaction to it. "Gabe was guilty as hell-- all I could do was joke about the fact that at least I didn't have my Deadlock tattoo anymore."

"You had a tattoo?" Hanzo asks, turning his head toward the man behind him, and he is rewarded with a kiss on the nose.

"I was only 17 when I joined Blackwatch-- even younger when I joined Deadlock. I was dumb." He shrugged. 

"Implying that you aren't, now?" Hanzo asks as he squirms, turning over to bury his face in Jesse's soft, hairy chest.

"Hey now," the cowboy protests, but there is no heat behind it, just warmth and content.

Hanzo felt almost uncomfortable with the amount of domesticity occurring at the moment-- but for Jesse he would do almost anything. For his own indulgences-- that he so long forced himself not to pay attention to-- he would do anything. Even ignoring his own insecurities-- which for Hanzo, was quite a feat.

Hanzo tilts his head up, chin pressed against Jesse's chest, and when he sees the other with his eyes closed and a smile on his lips, he decided.

Yes.

Yes, he was willing to do anything-- and go through anything-- for this man.


End file.
